CONFUSIONS OF LOVE.

Have you ever experienced the confusion of love??? Or is it just with me.

I was in a series of relationships, where my motto was only to flirt (I think those guys also or maybe not) and if by luck, I will find some good handsome Punjabi guy then to settle down with him. But only and only PUNJABI guy.

Then I changed my job and I met a guy here. Even before I joined this company, my sister in law who is working in the same company, told me that a guy here resemble my brother, means her beloved and she was very happy about  the thought that if he could turn out to be my would be husband.(Though I  suspect her intentions)

 So anyways, I joined this company, and really this guy was having a repute of being very decent, very sensible and very sincere in the company. Now, I usually go for looks a lot , well he was considerably good looking also. I lost my heart to him and I tried to draw his attention towards me.

 Though initially I was in a mood of flirt only with him, as I was having an opinion of marrying only with any Punjabi and he was pahadi. (Sharmas you know) he was a different type of guy, more I tried to be close with him, more h e seemed to be interested in friendship only. I was getting frustrated day by day on not being able to make him boy friend. Then ultimately, I lost my interest in him. I was not busy with my life and with my friends only.

One day , he asked me to go to temple with him, now it put me into surprise as I used to ask him before and he used to say no, sorry nicky, I am busy with my work.( no, it was not excuse , he is actually very loyal employee, mere fute karam :D) Then, I said no, I am going with my friend.

Now, he was interested in me, but I was not. One reason was that he was serious about me, but I did not want to be serious about anyone, because I was not in a mood of having love marriage, that too with a non Punjabi , oh my god, not possible at all.

I did all kind of things to make him away from me like denying to go anywhere with him, making him tore the movie tickets, in short, I did all kinds of things to make him go away from him and hate me. If any other guy would be there, he would have gone away ,but this time I got a different reaction from his side. He said” nicky, whatever you do, I will love you a lot for whole of my life. Even if , you want me to stay away from you, but  I will love you silently. Now I won’t force you for anything (for movies or coffee etc, please don’t misunderstand) and he cried. ( I have never seen any boy crying , instead of hurting me , he was hurt, and I could not stand it) I tried to give him a chance. I started to go with him, and he tuned 0ut to be a good boy friend in fact. Some of his qualities are:

1)      he never stopped me form doing anything, (hey , not bad things)

2)      He never says no if I am in the mood of going somewhere. Even if he is sick.

3)      He answers my every question. However, personal it may be)

4)      He is a total teetotaler.

5)      He earns good, and hold a good designation.

6)      Belongs to a good family.

7)      Is very decent, very innocent guy.

8)      He does not question me about my past. I have told you I was damn flirty and I have told him everything.

9)      He never says anything bad about anyone.

10)  He is having a small family.

11)  He is good looking also.

12)  He praises me a lot, always genuine.

13)  He actually cherishes every moment, which he spend s with me.

14)  Always listens to me , however rubbish I am talking, and give advises, suggestions, and comments also.

And etc. etc. et.c etc. etc. and etc.

Now, I have decided to marry him. My family has also come to know about it now. They are preparing to meet him, and understand him. Yar, I have now the following things going in my mind, please help me in finding solutions.

1)      he is non Punjabi. His and mine parents may have problem over it. Should I trust a out of community guy.

2)      He is 6 years older than me.

3)      He is very seedha type of guy. In today’s world, how will he survive,(well, he has already survived for so many years)but still.

4)      Man, there are hell of smart guys (I mean more smart from him, although I don’t know anything about their character, personality etc.) you know, yearning for more , more and more.

5)      What if, his parents did not approve of this relationship, how will he manage?

6)      Should I go for a love marriage??? What will my relatives say??

7)      I will lose my identity. My children will not be Punjabi anymore ,they will be  sharmas.

8)      What if my parents would have found a boy for me, and he would have been more smart and better , then what would have  been?

9)      Should I wait for sometime more??

Oh, please buddies,  help me out. Give me your suggestions and views, I am waiting desperately.